Another day , Another wedding

Finding a Prince Charming in the Costa del sol is quite a big difficulty. It´s either you meet old , sweaty, hairy holiday makers, mafias or Iberian men with 17th century mentality who think that a wife, a secretary and a maid are exactly the same thing. So, instead of hitting the bars on a Saturday night hoping that my future husband is out there waiting, I´d rather be in a nearby Chiringuito eating Tortilla de Patatas, drowning myself with tinto de verano while watching the mediterranean sun set in.

However; news of weddings back home always gives hope to the Bridget Jones that I am. That maybe someday, like them, I will find my own Mr.Darcy who will tell me " I love you as you are¨even if I weigh like an elephant...that special someone who will say "I do" in front of the altar without taking it back a couple of years after; then making the same promise again, this time to a much younger, sexier, surgically enhanced woman he just met in a drunken night out.

The news of my friends´---Matthias and Pam--- wedding did not surprised me. I knew that despite of their cultural differences, being a German and a Filipina, a profound feeling was present between them; something lasting. In a glance, Matthias and Pam are the exact opposite. Matthias; a tall, buffed, sweet white chocolate bar and Pam; a petite, tanned, exotic diva from the Far East. Matthias likes to flex his muscle in the gym and live healthy while Pam faithfully sticks to her Atkins Diet, Coke Light and used to smoke a thousand fags a day. Opposite as they might seem, they share one thing that makes their relationship work---they both have the passion for life. They share and enjoy things together from caving, scuba diving, mountain climbing, cart racing, travelling to the usual partying until dawn. I wouldn´t be surprised if one day, I will receive an email from Pam with their Skydiving pictures attached to it! They are both adventurous, love the outdoors and try new things boring people like me wouldn´t even dare to do. Aside from being lovers, I see them more as best friends, buddies who enjoy each other´s company and never gets tired of it. I look so forward to the future for these two. I know that they will remain not only lovers, but friends, for all of their life.

Pam and Matthias reminds me that love exists and it´s not an Urban Legend. Thinking about it, I think I should stop my compulsive eating of tortillas and look for my own Mr. Right. I just hope that his first name is not ALWAYS.

To Pam and Matthias: Salud, Amor y muchos NIÑOS en futuro! Un beso!

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On a happy note:

It is bright today!!!!!!! I can´t believe it. Yesterday, it was dark, gloomy, depressing with a hint of suicidal invitation but today, the sun comes out of it´s long hibernation and says HI! to the coast. Lovely.

I´ve got a my weekend all planned and i want Friday to end NOW. This afternoon, I´m planning to buy the anorexic camera I´ve been eyeing since last week. Saturday, I´m camwhoring in two destinations: Granada and Antequera! Lovely.

I know my blogsite has not been faithful yet to it´s title. It is suppose to focus on Costa del Sol, more or less like a guide to Andalucia. However, since I sent my digicam to Manila months ago, I didn´t have the luxury nor the enthusiasm to go places and tell my 2 avid readers about them. I´m planning to make a huge change with this blogsite---concentrating more on Spanish living so I MIGHT be deleting some stupid, self-incriminating articles I posted before. I´m planning to make this site money generating , so let´s wait and see. All that you will read in the future will be Lovely.

Never talk to Newbies

Yesterday I went to my bank to sort out things. My bank, SOLBANK is the most popular in the Costa del Sol for Expats and foreigners since they speak English. Their tag line ¨the bank you can talk to¨ holds true because they can speak ANY language you can imagine.

So, I went (the branch is just across my apartment) and was advised to see someone to sort out my problem. I have never seen before the woman who assigned to help me. I was sure she´s a newbie. I spoke to her in Spanish and in a flash of lightning, she went to check my details just to come back to me with a a bag full of ¨NO¨ in Spanish variations.Check:

No es possible (It is not possible)
No puedo (I can´t)
No puedes (You can´t)
No podemos (we can´t)
No pueden (they can´t)

I was ready to give her a verbal whipping but she was quick to say ¨there´s nothing I can do¨ so I stomped out of the bank without my usual ¨Muchas Gracias¨ and promised myself to go back the next day with a vengeance.

Today, I went back and this time, saw the bank executive to whom I opened my account three years ago. He knows me and I know him. Benalmadena is my BARRIO and I know it´s citizen by face. He was glad to help me and we sorted out my problem in a couple of minutes.

Newsflash: It is true---it is not WHAT you know, it is WHO you know. It applies everywhere you go.

I think I should start training my 3 year old niece to hone her social skills now. Also not to talk to strangers. Worse, a newbie.

The Stalking Hymn

This song haunts me like my deepest, darkest secrets. So diabolical, it is compulsive listening, really. It has been my invisible stalker for the past week that I even sang it in my dreams. Today I am submitting my weak self to this beautiful Portuguese-Canadian singer, Nelly Furtado.
I admit I shed a little tear or two listening to this when no one was around.
I need to get this off my head so I´m posting the original video and the one where she sang with Italian duo Zero Assoluto for a little dash of exoticism.

The song is contagious.You have been warned.

Tie me up! Tie me Down! a D&G Survey

Hottest news of the day from this side of the world:

The Spanish Women´s Institute is asking fashion label Dolce and Gabbana to pull out this ad:

This ad showing a woman pinned down on the floor (and liking it.just look at the bitch´s face) by a hunk, while four gorgeous voyeurs happily gaze, caused so much scandal here in Spain that an immediate pull out of all advertising media is asked by different feminist and consumer groups.

The Federation of Consumers in Action say that this ad crossed the line of the Advertising law that states ; it is prohibited to create an advertisement that is against the dignity of a person or vulnerable to the values and rights known to the constitution. The law concretes the prohibition of advertisements that represents any cruelty to women.

Questions of the Day:

1.Would they go ballistic if A GAY MAN was down and dirty on the floor instead of that woman?

2. Does it really insinuates violence to women OR is it a mere reflection that sometimes, we just want to be dominated?

3. Why does she look like she´s liking it? (answer: with those guys? WHO WOULDN´T!)

4. Would you like to be raped by Stefano Gabbana?

a) yes, with high heels

b) yes,without high heels

c) yes, if he was straight

d) yes, if he would give me a year-supply of D&G eyewear, bags, and accessories

d) yes, yes yes!

f) No, I´m a proper Catholic girl, and even thinking about it would lead me to hell

5) If you will be raped by the same men on the ad, would you like it? or Would you LOVE it?


The Season to Drag...

One of the many monstrous floats in Carnival, Madrid

It is carnival season again in Spain! The streets are flooded with decorated floats, bands, and fabulously-costumed Señores and Señoras of all ages. Every town has their own version of carnivals but what in Andalucia, CHIRIGOTAS-- a comedic choir accompanied by guitar, caja( drum box -used as percussion instrument ) and bombo--- is always the highlight of the show with of course, the election of the Reina del Carnaval (Carnival Queen). They sing satirical melodies mocking people, places, and just anything that they fancy bashing.Contestant in the ¨mejor coro del mundo¨ (best choir in the world), carnaval de Cadiz

Although some say that this festivity is religious, it has thrived into a wild excuse to gather and party on the streets thus, it was banned in the Franco Administration for 40 years. It is being held a week before the Ash Wednesday but even that is optional. Whatever the real reason is, I don´t care. If you care, ask WIKIPEDIA , not me. For me, the Carnival is the Spanish version of Valentines, in the massive commercialism conspiracy theory since it is held on a month when there is no significant reason to celebrate (and to spend) so they had to make their own. Also, it is the season to be happy, merry and gay; and the best excuse to dress up in DRAG. :)
the queen of the drag carnival in Madrid

Anyway, enough of the boring history. Let me tell you about MY history of the carnival. In my first year here in Spain, I went to a Carnival in a town called Torre Del Mar with José, a Venezuelan guy a I was dating back then. I guess it was magnificent! The first time I saw the whole, and I mean, the WHOLE town dressed up in costume , parading on the streets chanting. After the parade, there was the giving of prizes for the best act, best costumes...etc. It was fantastic but It was also the last day I saw José because he caught me toro-ing the cute, green eyed, 18 year old guy dressed as a Torero. Well, too bad.

The Carnival of Tenerife--the largest of the seven Canary Islands in Spain, is said to be the best Carnival in the world next to that of Rio De Janeiro´s. This year, the celebration was in danger since the neighbourhood filed for court order to stop it due to the NOISE. Hello! the carnival was going on forever and they JUST heard it? C´mon. So, everyone went out to the streets and protested. In the end, the case was dismissed since carnival is a tradition and headaches caused by massive noise is ALLOWED during this season.
carnival dancers
Anyway, the show went on and although there was a little scandal about the judging of this year´s Reina del Carnaval de Tenerife, this woman won:

Her name is Elizabeth Garcia Garcia. Doesn´t she look like a drag queen herself? I´m sure she was in the wrong reina contest but oh, well. At least she won.

Caribbean inspired carnival float

In my country, the Philippines, we do have a lot of festivities like these but mostly of religious nature and NO, NO nudity on the streets. Except of course during GAY PRIDE where you can choose from the best of Asian male flesh scattered on the streets of Malate--the gayest city of Manila. (ahhh...those were the days and I miss it)

In my grade school days, I had the chance to experience these kinds of thing. You parading on a float, dressing up in glittery costumes (maybe that was the reason why I am gay!??. Could it be?) and wearing a crown. It was our school´s search for King and Queen. However, it was more of a fund raising event for the construction of the school´s washroom, gates, I don´t really remember anymore. First counting of ballot, I was first. Last counting of votes, I was in third place. Why? Because my mom got half the money raised for me!!! hahaha.

She said, "you don´t need to win honey, you look like royalty already anyway".

Ahh, mothers. Sometimes they have their cheeky sides too.

True to the words of the great Celia Cruz...

Hay por que llorar
que la vida es un carnaval
y es mas bello vivir cantando
que la vida es un carnaval
y la penas se van cantando

why cry
life is but a carnival
and it is more beautiful to live singing
life is but a carnival
and the pains will go away singing

Life is Indeed a Carnival and I´m getting my feather boa now!